Doug & Seumas Finally Get Married!

Way back at the end of August I was contacted by Seumas.  He and long-time fiancé Doug were going to be getting married on October 3, and he wanted to know if I was available.  He also wanted me to understand that at the ceremony and outdoor picnic reception that would follow, they would be following very strict anti-Covid protocols, and wanted to be sure that I was OK with that.

I told Seumas that I had the date open, and had done another wedding during the summer that also was very strict with Covid protocols, and that I had no problem with those rules.  Over the next couple of days we traded a few more emails and then had a Zoom meeting, after which Seumas told me he wanted to hire me.

The funny thing is that soon after that he was talking with one of his best friends, who was helping with the wedding planning, and she asked him who he was having take the photos.  When Seumas replied “Tom Ellis”, she laughed and told him that I had been the photographer for her wedding, almost 20 years ago. And to make it even funnier, Seumas had been one of the honor attendants in that wedding, so we had actually worked together before!

Back to the story.  Seumas and I continued to correspond about wedding plans and photo timing, and he filled me in a bit further on the plans for making sure the wedding was as safe as possible for everyone there.  Several emails were sent to the guest list with all of the safety protocols outlined.  The reception was planned to be outdoors if the weather permitted, and if it was too wet/cold for an outdoor picnic then all the guests would be given picnic baskets to take home, and the reception would take place on Zoom.

Some Backstory on the Grooms

A little background on the two grooms, Seumas and Doug.  I am going to give you a direct quote from the marriage ceremony as conducted by  Priestess Judith Laxer, since it was one of the best wedding speeches I have ever heard from an officiant, and she does a far better job than I could –

“Seumas of Seattle, WA, USA and Doug of Vancouver, BC, Canada met 19 years ago, on April 7, 2001 at the Scottish Cultural Centre in Vancouver BC, where a very famous Scottish Gaelic singer, Cathy-Ann MacPhee, was performing. They had their first date in Seattle the next weekend and on it went. One thing you have to know about Doug is that the literal meanings of words are very important. So ‘boyfriend’ was out of the question as a way to refer to each other because, first, they are no longer boys and second, ‘friend’ doesn’t encompass the scope of their relationship.  Unbeknownst to Doug, Seumas adopted the alternative title for himself of ‘Potential Pre-Husband’.  One morning, after getting up quite early, making coffee and driving Doug to work, Doug put his hand on Seumas’s shoulder and said softly “Thank you for getting me here this morning.”

And Seumas replied, “That’s what Potential Pre-Husbands are for!”

“That’s a really long title.” Doug said.

“You’re the one who doesn’t like ‘boyfriend’.” Seumas quipped.

And Doug said, “I think of you as my fiancé.”

And Seumas answered, “I WILL!” And they were theoretically engaged. They didn’t speak of it again for years. After all, legal marriage wasn’t available at the time, and neither of them have much stomach for empty gestures.

Then, on July 20, 2005, Canada legalized same-sex marriage nation-wide. Some American friends of theirs decided to have a wedding ceremony in Vancouver, even though it wouldn’t be legal back in the States. They arranged a lovely ceremony on the upper deck of a harbor cruise boat, and afterward, they headed out into English Bay to enjoy the annual fireworks competition overhead and pretend it was for their friends.

Enjoying the views and each other, they strolled the decks. The muzak was light jazz, which neither of them had much taste for and Doug turned to Seumas and said “Tell me at our reception we’re not going to have…” Seumas didn’t let him finish “No. No light jazz.” And that was the second time they talked about their wedding.

They wanted to wait until marriage was legal in both countries before they would marry. In the intervening ten years before the United States followed Canada’s lead, many things happened along with their growing love. Doug decided to give post-secondary education a try for the first time, Seumas made and released his first solo CD and with Doug’s help got through the initial shock and lifestyle changes that a Type II Diabetes diagnosis brings with it.  Not long after these major events settled a bit, they were having dinner on a Sunday before Seumas was to drive home to Seattle. He broached the subject and said, “Honey, I’m OK, we’re OK, and we’ve got this now. But, if true disaster befell us, neither of us could take the other in because of that border. In the eyes of the law, we’re just friends.”

“We should start fighting about the guest list.” Doug answered and went back to enjoying his hot pot, which was getting cold, and the man is nothing if not practical.

In June of 2015, Justice Kennedy on the US Supreme Court cast the swing vote in favor of Gay marriage.

And with that historic vote, Seumas and Doug were free to begin their 5 year walk to this altar.”

There are considerably more twists and turns to the path that Doug and Seumas had to take before they finally reached their wedding day.  The ceremony was supposed to take place in Vancouver, but due to Covid it was easier for Doug to make the trip to the US than for Seumas to go to Canada.  So the decision was made to hold the wedding in Seumas’ stomping grounds rather than Doug’s.  But I did hear rumors that once regular travel between the US and Canada is allowed again, there is going to be a killer party up north!

The Wedding Day – Preliminaries

I arrived at the church, Shoreline Unitarian Universalist, at a bit before 3PM.  The weather was a typical overcast Seattle gray, partly caused by lingering smoke from wildfires.  But at least it was not raining!

The ceremony was scheduled for 4PM, and plans were to take all of the formal/posed photos before the ceremony.  When I pulled into the parking lot I found that there were already quite a few people there.  As I entered the church I was met by someone who checked my temperature, as well as had me answer a lot of questions to determine whether I might be a risk to spread Covid.  Fortunately I passed the tests!  Every guest would be tested this way.

I soon found Seumas and Doug, who I had not yet met or even talked with.  We discussed the plans, and organizer Carmen (whose wedding I had photographed so many years before) started to get everyone who needed to be in some wedding party group photos into the sanctuary so we could start pictures.

Here are the members of the wedding party –

Rev. Judith Laxer, Priestess
Seumas Gagne, Groom A
Doug Barr, Groom B
Sophia Kelly, Doug’s Best Woman
Lance Davey, Seumas’ Best Man
Zoë Hoffman, Seumas’ Ring bearer
Sebastian Weigel, Doug’s Ring bearer

After taking a variety of combinations of all of the wedding party both indoors and outdoors, I took “the boys” to a few locations around the outside of the church so we could have a little fun with some photos.  You’ll see a good selection of these photos below.

The Wedding Ceremony

Then it was time for the ceremony.  The guests all took their seats and the processional began.  An iPad was set up to act as a video camera, as well as to stream the ceremony to those who were not able to attend in person.

Priestess Judith performed a wonderful ceremony, part of which you read above.  Due to social distancing concerns the wedding party were a bit further apart than I would have liked for photo purposes, but that was a pretty minor thing if it helped make the ceremony possible.  As you’ll see in the photos, all of the participants (as well as all of the guests) wore masks with the exception of Seumas and Doug.

The Reception Picnic

At the conclusion of the ceremony everyone moved outdoors.  A table with boxed lunches and small bottles of wine was set up, and everyone picked up their food and moved to the grassy area  behind the church for the reception picnic.  Chairs were set up around the perimeter to allow people to stay with their pods while distancing from others.

The newlywed couple held court at one end of the lawn, though as it turned out they both spent more time on their feet visiting others than sitting and waiting for others to come to them.

Shortly before the reception ended there was a traditional cake cutting.  I have photographed somewhere north of 1200 weddings, and rarely eat wedding cake anymore.  But I made an exception in this case and I’m really glad I did!  It was made for the wedding by one of the guests, and not only tasted great but was a real work of art as well.  You won’t be able to have a taste, but hopefully the photos of the cake will give you a good idea of how beautiful it was.

All in all it was an incredible day, and I am so glad that I was able to be a part of it.